February 2012
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WatchOne of the many reasons why I couldn’t be a professional comedian: Amy Poehler makes jokes, whereas my natural response to Congress’ assault on women’s rights involves pitchforks, torches, and a an inevitable trip to Gitmo.
« thedailywhat
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Blah blah blah holiday blah
This time of year, to honor the she-wolf who supposedly suckled founding brothers Romulus and Remus, the ancient Romans would paint themselves with blood and milk (symbols of fertility) and run through the streets—clothed only in hide loincloths, if at all—striking anyone they came across (especially women) with whips.
So, let’s celebrate. Line forms to the left.
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Anonymous asked: You sound like you're obsessed with your own asshole. Get over yourself.
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The Anti-Inspiration of True Genius
I’m kind of glad I didn’t get around to reading much David Foster Wallace until recently.
I’ve just finished the entirety of Consider the Lobster (the essay collection, not just the article originally published in Gourmet), and if I hadn’t completed the process of applying to MFA programs prior to reading it, I’m not sure any of my applications would’ve made it...
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“All Property, indeed, except the Savage’s temporary Cabin, his Bow, his...”
– Ben Franklin, on reciprocal obligation and the inherently social aspects of personal wealth.
Talk about the Founding Fathers some more, you disingenuous scumbag motherfuckers.