Today in headlines that are, incredibly, neither satirical nor sensationalist.
Above: Ambassador WK demonstrates his diplomatic prowess (photo via Stereogum)
Ohio really did go to the president last night.
And he really did win.
And he really was born in Hawaii.
And he really is -legitimately- President of the United States.
And the Bureau of Labor Statistics did not make-up a fake unemployment rate last month.
And the Congressional Research Service really can find no evidence
That cutting taxes on rich people grows the economy.
And the polls were not skewed to over-sample Democrats.
And Nate Silver was not making up fake projections about the election
To make conservatives feel bad.
He was doing math.
And climate change is real.
And rape really does cause pregnancy sometimes.
And evolution is a thing.
And Benghazi was an attack on us.
It was not a scandal by us.
And no one is taking away anyone’s guns.
And taxes haven’t gone up.
And the deficit is dropping, actually.
And Saddam Hussein didn’t have weapons of mass destruction.
And the moon landing was real.
And FEMA isn’t building concentration camps.
And UN election observers aren’t taking over Texas.
And moderate reforms of the regulations on the insurance industry
And the financial services industry
Are not the same thing as communism.
The veracity of this video has yet to be 100% confirmed, so I’ll just say this:
If you use an electronic voting machine, make damn sure it registers your actual choice.
The Mitt Romney who appeared on the stage at the University of Denver seemed to be fleeing from the one who won the Republican nomination on a hard-right platform of tax cuts, budget slashing and indifference to the suffering of those at the bottom of the economic ladder. And Mr. Obama’s competitive edge from 2008 clearly dulled, as he missed repeated opportunities to challenge Mr. Romney on his falsehoods and turnabouts.
Virtually every time Mr. Romney spoke, he misrepresented the platform on which he and Paul Ryan are actually running.
This is more a personal quibble of mine, but why do you hate freedom? Why do you hate the fact that other people want a chance to live their lives and be happy, even though they may believe in something different than you, or act different than you? How does gay marriage, in any way shape or form, affect your life? If gay marriage becomes legal, are you worried that all of a sudden you’ll start thinking about penis? “Oh shit. Gay marriage just passed. Gotta get me some of that hot dong action!” Will all of your friends suddenly turn gay and refuse to come to your Sunday Ticket grill-outs? (Unlikely, since gay people enjoy watching football too.)
Minnesota Vikings punter Chris Kluwe is not happy with Maryland state delegate Emmett C. Burns Jr’s attempts to get the Baltimore Ravens’s owner to silence linebacker (and marriage equality fan) Brendon Ayanbadejo.
I am not a fan of football.
I am a fan of Chris Kluwe.
The church doesn’t say that the ordination of women is not possible because somehow women are unfit to carry out functions of the priest, but because on the level of sacramental signs, it’s not the choice that our Lord made when it comes to those who act in his very person, as the church’s bridegroom. And you can say that sounds like a lot of poetry or you know, how do we know that’s true, but if you’re a Catholic, this is part of our sacraments and practice for 2 millennia, and it’s not just an arbitrary decision of male oppression over women.
Of course it was “an arbitrary decision of male oppression over women”; it was just an arbitrary decision of male oppression over women that was made two thousand years ago.
Just because discrimination has been institutionalized, it doesn’t mean that it’s magically not discrimination. To the contrary, it’s much, much worse now, because we know the world is round and revolves around the sun and we’ve tamed fire and harnessed the atom and invented toilets and should fucking know better.
Larry King’s AMA is the Best Thing.
Today’s important fact: Larry King owns approximately 14,400 inches (or 1,200 feet) of suspenders.
Companies House filings show that Mr Murdoch stepped down from the boards of the NI Group, Times Newspaper Holdings and News Corp Investments in the UK last week. He also quit a number of News Corp’s US boards, the details of which have yet to be disclosed by the US Securities and Exchange Commission.
A step in the right direction.